Somewhere in the skies over Asia I hover suspended between worlds. Around me the cabin lights are dim, just an occasional splash of moving colour from tiny seat-back tv screens. The flight is half empty and passengers are sprawled full length across rows of seats, dozing fitfully. Earphones, emitting soothing classical music, mask the throb of jet engines. An occasional jolt of turbulence reminds me that I am airborne and high above the Indian Ocean. Thoughts drift inevitably and nervously to the tragic passengers on flight MH 370. What did they know of their fate? What will we ever know? Enough never to take long-haul air travel for granted again, or to fasten a safety belt at take-off without offering a blessing for them and their families.
Somewhere in Beijing my son Shane tosses and turns, sleeping lightly in anticipation of his parent’s arrival. Shan pulls the duvet over her head hoping for a brief Saturday morning lie-in. My little grandson plays in his cot, babbling away to himself and wondering if he dares wake MaMa and DaDa up just yet. He senses a mood of excitement in the air, a rush of apartment cleaning yesterday, a particular spring in his Dad’s step, a giddiness in the FaceTime call with his Nai Nai and Ye Ye who were in some noisy busy place with what looked like very big birds in the background. But hey he’s living in the moment and that toy just out of reach is much more important right now. Maybe it is time to call DaDa.
Somewhere in Sydney my daughter Claire stretches and rises to an Autumn Saturday morning and contemplates the Chinese feast she is planning for a group of her friends this evening, a house warming in her and Mike’s beautiful new home. But first perhaps there is time for a brisk walk at Clovelley Beach and to find the ingredients for Peking Duck and Hoisin Sauce made the way her Mum likes it.
Somewhere in Austria my Mum settles down for a night’s sleep, reliving her day of sight-seeing with my brother and his wife, marvelling at the things she has seen that she never expected to see in her life-time and wishing my Dad was there to share the adventure.
Somewhere, sometimes it is good to pause and reflect and to savour the moment and the anticipation.
After the excitement of Shananigans’ Christmas and Shane and Shan’s wedding it has been a hectic 14 weeks since we last spent time with our little Chinese family.
In our weekly FaceTime calls we can spot the changes in Dermot. Gone is the crawling baby who quickly found every danger spot in our house, to be replaced by a little boy with a new haircut toddling around on two feet and finding a whole new level of treasures now within his reach. His infectious personality and fun-loving spirit emerge more distinctly with every passing week. And as for his love of food, well he didn’t lick it off the stones.
He knows us now on FaceTime, getting giddy whenever he hears the sound of an incoming call and waiting with restless impatience when Shane or Shan try to connect with us. He is just beginning to say his first words in Mandarin. We have silly games we play during our iPad chats as he dips in and out of the conversation, wandering off when he gets bored with grown-up talk.
But I still can’t imagine the feel of him, the squidgy hugs, the life-force of the three-dimensional him. Each time I get back to him it’s the same but different – the same joyous tug at the heart-strings coupled with the need to get to know the newness of him all over again, the same nervousness about how he will react – wide-eyed maybe, perhaps even a bit scared – to seeing us in the flesh but knowing that it will be ok, even if it takes a while. There are bonds that can’t be broken.
Busy work schedules haven’t left much time for cooking, blogging or reading in recent weeks. You have been very patient kind readers as I can see from Google Analytics that, despite that, you continue to dip in and out of the blog every day. I intend to rectify my lapses over the next week or two by reporting on our nine day visit to Beijing and our latest adventures in China. Watch out for tweets from me @julieon with the hashtag #NaiNaiVisit and posts on Shananigans Facebook Page too.
I’m also hoping to read more about China and by Chinese writers while I’m here. I’ve just finished Kinder than Solitude by Yiyun Li who grew up in Beijing and moved to the United States in 1996 and I can highly recommend it. It weaves between the present day and 1990s China in a haunting tale of the ties that bind with striking insights into the way of life and mindset of Beijingers.
I can’t rival Des Bishop – and by the way if you haven’t watched Des Bishop – Breaking China you simply must, you will find the first three episodes on RTE Player – he captures the essence of Beijing and the Chinese in his own inimitable style. But let’s see if we can have some fun, new experiences and good food over the next nine days as well as some much needed Nai Nai time, with Ye Ye getting a look in too.
So sit back, fasten your seat belts and enjoy the ride.